Thursday, October 8, 2009

Real Moms. Real Stories.

Our contest team is made up of moms and people who have moms so that means we all have funny tales to tell of the kid and parent dynamic. The first such tale is from Julienne, word guru and mom extraordinaire. Her story is one of those that might not have seemed so funny at the time, but is definitely chuckle-worthy now.

Moms know it's hard to teach your kids to be truthful and polite at the same time. My daughter could be in-your-face telling long-winded neighbors "good-bye" when she thought they should leave, or proclaiming that a playmate's house was "messy," then offering the helpful tidbit, "Vacuum it!" But nothing tops the time she came into a circle of my friends gathered for a lovely autumn tea. Someone's sweater smelled like mothballs and Bridget was trailing the scent. I saw her little nose circle the room in search of the source. Before I could take evasive action she declared, "Lady has a smell." Up went her pointer finger, "This lady!" I mumbled some compliment about the woman's perfume, shoved a cookie in Bridget's mouth and dragged her out of the room. Sometimes I think honesty is overrated.


So how about it? What's your funny childhood or parenthood tale? Leave a comical comment, why don't ya?


Grandma With A Camera said...

When my Grandson was two, we were reciting Shakespeare to him. He picked up on the Balcony scene and memorized.. "But soft, what light through yonder window breaks....". Of course, it was so cute that we requested him to perform on demand.. perhaps once to often. When I asked him to recite for a dear friend of mine, he promptly yelled "Buzz Off!"
My friend was amusedly aghast.. "He just told me to Buzz off!"
The following week in the car.. I asked him to recite again... and again I was told "Buzz off!"
I said "Don't say Buzz off.. that's naughty." From the back of the car I heard a hurt little voice say "Buzz off is naughty Grandma?" Yes, it is.
Immediatley after.. he recited.. "Buzz off! What Light through yonder window breaks!".
Oh did I have guilt over that one... guilt and a good chuckle as well.

Wordy McGee said...

Ha! That's priceless. What a little genius you have. A sassy one, at that. Thanks for sharing your story. I needed a laugh today.

Sandi said...

To make my long story very short - it was the 70's. My daughter was 4. My ex and I had the bright idea to call our private parts Charlie and Suzie (why??). Ex and his boss played golf one day and returned to the house for a cold one. Boss (president of the company!) chatting with my daughter saying he had two little girls about her age. "What are their names?" asked my inquisitive daughter. "Amy and Suzie" replied Mr. Boss. My ex and I could hardly breathe - and my daughter was in hysterical laughter mode - "her name is SUZIE??" she asked incredulously? "Why did you name her Suzie?". "Mommy - they named her SUZIE!!" She would look to us half horrified/half hysterical and just kept asking the boss over and over and OVER why her name was Suzie! He must have thought she was the strangest child. We were able to get out of the situation without the boss finding out the reason for her concern. That night we decided to tell our daughter what the real names of your body parts should be! I don't know what we were thinking - I blame the 70's!

Sandideer said...

My son Justin was about 4 years old...we were standing in the checkout at our local K-Mart.In front of us, with a cart full of purchases was a woman who was very large in stature.Justin spent a few minutes surveying the contents of her cart and her as we waited patiently.
He turned to me in his 4 year old LOUD voice and said "MOM, WHY IS THAT LADY SO FAT?."
As I crawled out from under my cart with embarrassement I whispered loudly in an apologetic voice " Justin,it isn't nice to talk about people behind their backs!"
Without giving me any time to stop him, he walked right up to the woman, tugged on her coat, looked her right in the face and asked her, " WHY ARE YOU SO FAT?"
Good thing she had a GREAT sense of humor...she laughed and told him that she really liked cookies!
On the trip home we had a talk about what Bambi's Mom told him..."If you don't have something nice to say , don't say nuthin' at all!"

He has turned out to be a great POLITE young man, despite his younger inquisitive nature!